My state of mind,

I find,

swings between

despair 

and hope,

repair 

and NOPE—

I will never

submit

to THAT

which I know

to be

evil

and cynical

and also

cyclical

in the story

of people.

My apology

to history,

the people

who endured

before me,

as I blindly

thought

I was taught

that we are

always advancing.

And yet,

pendula 

swing;

never still,

as people

will

always

want 

change

and security.

In my immaturity,

I believed

I was conceived

in a world

so naive,

and that each 

generation

has more 

sophistication.

Survival

of the fittest

survives

the silliest

interpretation,

as though

those

who perished

in concentration

camps

or gulags

or at the hands

of thugs

anywhere

at anytime

were somehow

not clever

enough

or sufficiently

strong.

I was wrong.

How many

martyrs

have been made

of great

men

and the unknown

women

whose notions

caused commotions

and retreat

from promotions

of freedoms

barely perceptible,

held unacceptable,

untenable,

and therefore,

killed?

My current

state

of anxiety

swings

wildly

from hour

to hour,

fearing our

future,

and lamenting

our past.

History

has given

us everything,

and we are

swinging

at curve balls

and striking 

out.

This one

feels like

we might

swing

and miss.

and kiss

the whole

game 

goodbye. 

But as I

have stated

before,

I can’t ignore

the strategy

of hate

and fear,

for some,

a career,

so easy

to fall 

prey.

Election Day

feels so 

consequential;

even existential,

but life

will not 

suddenly

stop.

We may

enter

a new 

swing state

that may

bring

a slate

of new

legislation.

But like

millions

before

us,

who wouldn’t

ignore 

us,

they too

maintained

ideas

of progression

from which

each digression

when the pendulum

swings back,

feels like history

is pale

by comparison.

Yet the rhymes

or echoes

swinging

back

and forth

bring forth

for me

all of history;

not just

the infamous,

but the anonymous

people

who stood

for goodness

sakes

even when

the stakes

were life

and death.

For all 

the difference

tomorrow

will make,

for the sake

of those

I will never

meet,

I will treat

this state

of swinging

from or 

toward

something

familiar

or untoward

as an imperative

for a  more

creative

and inclusive

way to live.