health

Target

Yesterday, the revelation that over 40 million people may have been hacked at Target over the last few weeks was stunning and terrifying. I suspect that Target wasn’t the only target. I would not be surprised to learn that other stores were also targeted. Certainly the holiday shopping season (the fifth season from Thanksgiving to just after New Year’s) is the perfect time to breach a retailer’s system. Of course, it’s not just the retailer who is ruined. Millions of lives are, at best, disrupted. For some, the impact may be horrific, especially at this time of year.

It is easy to feel paranoid these days. So much seems out of our control. To be up to speed (which is quite fast), one must surrender to more and more channels and networks, further and further removed from an original action, that through incredible technology, allows actions and transactions to occur instantaneously. We tend to forget that because so much of our transactions are instantaneous, that there is actually a network out there–wherever there is. It feels immediate and therefore gives us the sense of interaction. Or maybe we are just more willing to surrender to what seems so much easier than waiting. We feel like we can accomplish so much more than we used to. But, there are daily reminders of nefariousness. It is easy to feel like a target.

Like terrorism, cyber hacking seems to prey on obvious targets through innocent civilians who are merely living their lives. It is cruel and terrifying, and after each incident, we redouble our efforts to create better protection. But the fear and paranoia lingers as we increase safety measures. There is a sense that we are always targets.

When we are able to put aside the threats of terrorism and hacking, we worry that we are being targeted by the NSA, or advertisers, or even by political ideologues. It seems as though we are targeted by anyone and everyone. While some target us for our potential business or donations, others target us as “the other”, and therefore the problem: teachers; unions; single parents; poverty stricken; Wall Streeter; drug addicted; super wealthy; politician; left; right; religious; atheist; ……You are either with us or against us. Marketers seek their target audiences. We target others and get targeted by others all the time.

While it is easy to be concerned about nefarious targeting and the fear of being an innocent victim, I am actually more concerned about the prosaic targeting that is part of our culture and constantly exhibited by individuals regardless of beliefs or station in life. We live in echo chambers. It is tribal. We seem more focused on targeting frustrations at others than on working through problems, integrating different components. Yes, compromising.  The holidays may be a time to reflect upon targets. We like New Year’s resolutions as they redirect our attention toward personal improvement (usually not at the affect of others). When we target others, we diminish them. They become one dimensional. When we include others–even differing opinions and ways–the target shifts toward building; toward more dimensions.

2013 was a year of many difficulties that became compounded by targeting individuals or agencies for blame, rather than acknowledging what (or who) was problematic and  focusing on improvement.  We had plenty of target practice this year, perfecting the aim with our weaponry, literally and figuratively.  We can aim for much better–changing the old targets. There is so much that we can’t control–or rather–there is only so much that we can control. We can choose new targets that do not diminish. The narrow targets, those that are from a single point of view, diminish. This holiday season, when we try to take a break from our troubles and  enjoy our families and some peace, we can redirect and begin a new target practice. Don’t target others. Aim positively. Happy Holidays!

Assisted Living Facility

Living independently is a particularly American ideal. Individualism emphasizes the value of self-reliance and independence. The concept of independence as individualism has progressed toward libertarianism with increasing zeal in more recent years. As a culture, we have developed the attitude that dependence, or needing assistance, is negative. Not only have we as a culture historically looked down upon those needing assistance, but we have also looked down upon care givers. Those who care for others are often regarded as unskilled, perhaps  less intelligent and/or  less educated, or without leadership abilities. They are often considered beneath the “real” workers and leaders. Historically, women have been the care givers, and when women did work outside the home (perhaps before marriage, until feminism kicked in), the jobs were usually seen as extensions of care giving–teaching, secretarial work, nursing. These were so-called “pink collar” jobs, as were other jobs that recruited women, including stewardesses, hostesses, and waitresses. When women began to have greater access to any careers, and some brave men ventured into what was known as “pink collar” jobs, some job titles changed to reflect more gender neutrality.  Stewardesses became flight attendants. Waiters and waitresses are now referred to as servers. Secretaries, usually responsible for correspondence, morphed into administrative assistants. Although secretaries were mostly female pre-feminism, the title “administrative assistant” signified a broadening of the administrative tasks and responsibilities (including project management and other administrative tasks beyond correspondence), but also signified a break from the pre-feminist association with (female) secretaries.

Now, as we forge ahead attempting to balance demands of the workplace with the demands of a home life, and we continue to expand our notions of gender and identities, we continue to wrestle with our cultural notions of independence. We still tend to equate maturity with independence– not with care giving. We still tend to equate ability with independence– not with sharing. A facility for assisted living refers to a place for those whose abilities may be diminished, and support services are available as needed without 24 hour care. We think of assisted living facilities as places designed to provide freedom and dignity for those in need of support for activities of daily living. What about our own internal facilities for assisted living–our own capacities to support one another?

We tend to not only devalue care givers and others in supportive roles, but we have even ascribed blame to them in relation to those who have suffered from addictions and behavior problems. The care givers are blamed as the co-dependents and/or the enablers. That is not to say that negative symbiotic relationships don’t exist. Of course they do,and often when dealing with destructive behaviors and relationships, we must be aware of the potential for co-dependency and enabling. But assisting living, is productive. Some people have a greater capacity for assisting and supporting than others, but like any capacity, we can learn and practice and develop. We can even elevate ourselves and others. Nurture may be part of nature, but it is also honed. We can develop our capacities to assist others, but we must also develop our awareness of the specialness of that capacity.

Living requires assistance and assistants. We delude ourselves into thinking that we are most dignified when we are independent. We are most dignified, when we give of ourselves to others and use our efforts to support others to be their best. We can develop our assisted living facility. This moves us and our culture forward.

Leisure Suits

I was born in 1963, just before Camelot was obliterated. By the time I started grade school, sartorial splendor was becoming a thing of the past.  In the 70s, countering the culture largely meant wearing informal, poorly made, unflattering, and often, just ugly clothes.  Changing one’s appearances was meant to denote changing  one’s attitudes. Relaxed fit clothing (before we called a particular style of jeans “relaxed fit”) was supposed to reflect greater freedom, fewer constraints, undoing structures of culture, and a more casual attitude. Adults were uptight; youths were tuning in, turning on and dropping out, which meant building a new harmonious society. Imagine. Then came those horrific Leisure Suits. Even then, I thought they were hideous and silly. The worst part was that Leisure Suits were for dressing up. They didn’t look comfortable or flattering, and came to represent a cheap, synthetic, and middling culture; a culture that was apathetic and confused, low brow and lazy.

A generation later, our children have grown up with a more robust culture. While access to information and communication has been revolutionized in the last generation, there has also been a renaissance of leisure activities and accoutrements. The leisure business is enormous, and people invest great time and money into leisure activities. This has been a terrific boon over the last generation, not only economically, but culturally. Pursuing a leisure activity such as a sport or art is productive. For years I have cautioned parents about over scheduling their children. Children (and adults) need unscheduled free time, but pursuing a hobby or activity (beyond looking at a screen) on a regular basis can provide skills that may go beyond the activity.

When we find a leisure activity that suits us, we strengthen ourselves and can expand. There are all kinds of attributes to all sorts of sports and arts, but the activities themselves often become metaphors for us. I was a great swimmer as a young child, and enjoyed the competence and strength I felt in the water. Many  years later in college, I swam every morning, as it felt like the only way my thoughts could flow in order to write papers. I hardly go to the pool for a swim these days, but I’m very much a swimmer in other ways, and yes, still a lifeguard of sorts. I tend to dive into whatever I pursue. Somehow, I’ve been able to stay afloat, treading from time to time, but mostly propelling myself forward using all my muscles, along the surface of the tide. I was well suited to swimming, and swimming suits me.

Those who are well suited to their work are often quite successful. It’s not always easy to find work that suits us. We often think of work as effort, and leisure as effortless, but there can be joyful effort in both work and play.  Leisure activities are not only ways to  have fun, unwind and relax, but are often ways in which we can more fully realize ourselves and develop our strengths to use in various capacities.  Leisure suits!

Prep

Maria Montessori was the original prep. No, she was not a preppy kind of gal in the sense of one who goes to a school that typically feeds the top colleges and universities and wears boxy clothes and shoes, with distinctive speech, vocabulary and mannerisms. Nor was she of the subculture that emulates the preppy style. Maria Montessori developed a philosophy of education from the concept of the prepared environment. While the Montessori method of pedagogy stems from this notion of creating a structure and order  so that individuals can be free to explore and choose that which best suits his or her needs, the prepared environment fosters independence and responsibility to oneself and to others. Even with individualization we can create social cohesion.

Although Maria Montessori studied young children and developed her philosophy and pedagogy for educating young children, the concept of the prepared environment is useful in other contexts. Currently, we are transitioning toward a new era in health care and education in the U.S. Some people are skeptical; some are fearful; some are hopeful. Regardless of the emotional dispositions people may have, change is upon us, and while there are still many people who resist change (or deny the need or reality of these changes), there are great efforts being made to prepare the citizenry for the soon to be implemented Affordable Care Act and The Common Core.

The Affordable Care Act, aka Obamacare, is intended to increase the affordability and rate of health insurance coverage for Americans. It is also intended to streamline and improve the delivery of healthcare outcomes with the additional aim of lowering Medicare spending. As these reforms are new, the new healthcare environment seems rather daunting. Best to be prepared. There will be a barrage of ads and public service announcements soon, so that citizens/consumers/employers will be prepared to choose intelligently. Meanwhile, you can begin to get educated by perusing  https://

www.healthcare.gov/marketplace/individual.

And while we are discussing getting educated…..There is a new and potentially exciting educational reform being implemented called The Common Core. While some fear a federal government take over of education, and reflexively call for states to protest to assert their power to maintain their own education standards, the lack of cohesion and the lack of academic rigor that has plagued the nation under the previously scattered state standards has weakened our education system for a generation and created ill prepared young adults. The Common Core is an attempt to create common standards so that no state can dumb down the individual state curriculum or tests to get better results. The Common Core is a coordinated effort among governors and educators, parents and employers, using best practices and evidence from the U.S. and abroad, to create a more rigorous and deeper curriculum that is clear, consistent, and aligned with college and work expectations. The Common Core is more than benchmarks. It calls for a different pedagogy; one that creates deeper learning and application of knowledge that represents higher order thinking skills. Educators are preparing for this new education environment, and you can begin to prepare and educate yourself :http://www.corestandards.org/

Through the prepared environment, we can more thoughtfully engage while meeting our own requirements and responsibilities. This is the seed of a healthy and educated society and civic culture. Now we are literally getting prepared for a potentially healthier and better educated society. It is possible to create a healthier, more educated civic culture. Prepare for success!

Body of Work

**This entry is a departure for me, and I hope my intention will be understood.  In coming to terms with my own body of work, I hope to connect more, and have others consider what limits are imposed on us from physical, psychological, and cultural circumstances. I have never been comfortable discussing my limitations, but I hope that others will relate to whatever limits them and engage in how we can expand the possibilities for productivity and living creatively.

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UNCLE!  I have been wrestling with my physical difficulties for over fifteen years.  Of course I must keep wrestling, as autoimmune disease flares can be so difficult to withstand, much less manage. Even in between violent flares, (or even less violent flares) during supposed remissions, I don’t feel well—just less bad– and can medicate to be vibrant for a few hours at a time. If I am very careful, and exclude certain activities and include hours of rest, I can participate in limited activities and celebratory events, and no one would know anything. It is always carefully orchestrated. To complicate matters, I have had (and continue to struggle with) excruciating and debilitating spine problems, that have made normal activities anything but normal. I have preferred chairs, and shoes and bed and pillows, and have tried so many therapies and remedies (and surgeries). I have always done modest exercise and eaten organically. I do all the right things, and every day is such a struggle. I have had to acknowledge my limitations, as they have interfered with home and work and my abilities to participate, especially because I take every effort to not look compromised. I am blessed to have great support, and my spouse’s insurance, and I put myself together every single day. That’s the big accomplishment. I don’t want to look (or sound) like I feel. Often, I can’t even answer the phone, because I don’t have the energy. Usually, I have to get myself together, have some caffeine before conversations, so that I can fully engage. Then I am spent.

My work history has been challenging. I have only been able to work part-time, and often I have had to stop to recalibrate, as daily routines for most people are just too much for me. For well over a decade, I doubted myself.  After so many years, I saw that when I have the “normal” ailments that plague people, I am better able to deal with those, than with my default body. The hardest part, though, has been feeling unproductive and having to ask for help. That is a source of shame for me.  I confess all of this because I know that there are so many people who struggle with an array of difficulties that may or may not fit our conventional categories of ability or disability. There are so many people with more seriously challenging circumstances than mine, and with more serious conditions than mine, and that has always made me question my own capabilities. We work to live, and many people live to work. I have just been working on living and have tried to maximize my unspectacular life’s work.

Thus far, my life’s work has not been published or patented, and probably not even downloaded. I have sought to share my education and appreciation for the arts with others, especially with adolescents, who even in the best of circumstances, must navigate tumult and difficult terrain . I have taught various subjects and students in a variety of educational settings, all along the spectrum of learning abilities. It’s not sexy work, (nor status work), and has often been fraught with frustration, as adolescents are intuitively gifted at frustrating adults, but I have gotten to learn and improve along the way. There are many, many bodies whose work I have supported and guided, and I hope illuminated, at least from time to time. As for my body of work….even with all the compromises and interruptions, I have worked to expand myself and others. At this point, my body is an awful lot of work. But there are still ways to participate, expand, and contribute; perhaps remotely.

I hope you are reminded that there is much joy and struggle that we often do not see when meeting others. Looks can indeed be deceiving. I am fortunate in so many ways, but I long to contribute more; to continue educating myself and others; to create connections and strengthen my community, and to support creative living and learning, even with this body of work.