politics

Hearing women

Capitol Policewoman

Caroline Edwards

Testified

Bearing her Trauma

Divulging the truth:

On January 6th,

Slipping 

In people’s blood

“I was catching people

As they fell.”

“It was carnage.

It was chaos.”

“…I would find myself

in the  middle

Of a battle.”

Fulton County Georgia

Election workers

Mother and daughter

Testified

Of threats and abuse.

Shaye Moss recalled

Her living nightmare

“All because 

Of lies

For me doing my job.”

“A lot of them

 Were racist,

A lot of them 

Were 

Just Hateful.”

“Be glad 

it’s 2020

And not 

1920,”

Shaye recounted.

Shaye’s mother,

“Lady”Ruby Freeman,

A proud 

American citizen

Who

Stood up

“To help Fulton County

Run An Election

In the middle

Of the pandemic.”

“Do you know 

How it feels 

To have the President

Of the United States

Target you?”

“But he

Targeted me—

Lady Ruby…

A proud American citizen…”

Ms. Cassidy Hutchinson

Mark Meadows’ 

Assistant

Overheard and witnessed

The callous and crazy.

The 25 year old

Aid

Repeated what she heard

The POTUS 

Say:

“I don’t effing care

That they have weapons. 

They’re not here

To hurt me.”

“Take the

 Effing

Mags

Away.”

“Let my people in.”

“I’m the effing

President.

Take me up

To the Capitol

 Now.”

“Sir,

We have to go

Back

To the West Wing.”

Said the Secret Service

Driver 

of the

Beast.

“Ketchup

Dripping

Down

The wall.”

When Meadows was asked

About 

“Hang Mike Pence”

Mark said to Pat (Cipollone the lawyer):

“You heard him

Pat.

He thinks

Mike deserves it.”

To which Pat 

Responded:

“This is 

Effing 

Crazy.

We need

 To be 

Doing 

Something 

More.”

“Mr. Meadows

Did seek 

That pardon.

Yes, Ma’am.”

June 2022

A miscarriage

Has occurred.

Actually, an

Abortion.

Fifty years in the making

Seeking to criminalize

Those most

Desperate.

Overturned

But not over,

The tide will turn

Toward Justices

Corrupt

From Dark Money

And desperate for

Supremacy.

Rights for

Individuals

Who can’t get

Pregnant.

Now

The law sanctions

Open Carry

To full term.

I’m expecting

Violence

In response to

“Pro Lifers”

Who care

Nothing

For those already

Born.

Except

For the right

To bear arms

Anywhere.

I hemorrhaged

Tears

And could barely

Breathe.

This is an

Assault

On women and girls’

Rights.

I will not dwell

In the cruelty

Pain

And contractions.

We will

Heal

And create

Anew.

Mourning Sickness

Today I feel gutted.

I was already gutted by the mass shooting at the Tops supermarket in Buffalo, and the next day, as though re-gutted, the mass shooting at the elementary school in Uvalde, Texas. As unbearably horrific as that mass shooting was, the cover up is even more grotesque to me. Anyone could understand the fear police might have when encountering a deranged shooter with an automatic weapon. Hesitation might occur. Hyper-caution to avoid children…ok. Then why the lies and covering up the story? I am not sure I have the stomach for the answer.

I felt gutted yesterday watching The January 6th Hearings and listening to members of Trump’s DOJ recount 45’s intense and insane pressure to install Jeffrey Clark in the final weeks of his presidency. This, after hearings in which witness after witness relayed Trump’s efforts to overaturn a legitimate democratic election that he lost. Election workers were abused; their lives endangered. VP Mike Pence’s life was in danger. The sickness of Trump’s pathetic cleaving to power and the sad, angry, delusional devotees who are empowered to serve him leave me distraught. When I am not angry and fearful (of so many angry, fearful people with serious gun power), I am profoundly sad that so many people have succumbed to such a gross excuse for a human being and for perpetuating cruelty and selfishness.

Yesterday, upon hearing the news of the Supreme Court’s ruling allowing open carry–because….you know….individual rights/liberties–I was at once terrified and broken. I believe there is now such a tension between the hyper-individualsts who embrace a particular definition of macho and those who are actually more driven to protect the lives of the already born, that the menacing and threatening that seems empowering will only cause if not a conventional civil war, then a serious threat to everyone.

And this morning, with the news of the Supreme Court overturning Roe v wade, I am actually sick to my stomach. I am in mourning. Democracy, which I certainly took for granted in the once USA, is on life support. I am mourning American life that had promise.

I was briefly uplifted by the seemingly ordinary people who became heroic to me: during Trump’s 2 impeachments; during the worst days (and throughout) the COVID19 pandemic; Zalensky; some Republicans who have been Trump loyalists in his administration; unceremonious election workers; Capitol police officers, all of whom bravely stood up to endure under duress and bear testimony to truth. There is still truth. There is still decency. Perhaps too little too late, but some people have been moved. I have learned of goodness and decency during such trials, when so much crazy and serious danger has been thrust upon us and relentlessly spewing through media over the last 6 years.

But whatever solace I felt was amidst the mourning for the beauty that was the promise of life here in the USA, even in this very dangerous 21st century. I am grieving not so much for the world in which I grew up, but for the willingness that we had to continue to improve; to no longer stand for what was, even if we endured it.

I have had queasiness every day for years now, but hoping it would subside when this period finally settled down. Today’s overturning of Roe v wade was not surprising, but it is nonetheless chilling. It is nauseating. And the waves keep coming.

I am mourning the loss of separation between church (all religion) and state; of the recognition of the dignity of all living beings who have been born; of the danger of guns; of peaceful elections and transitions of power; of a healthy climate–political, social, economic,natural.

But after the mourning one must get on with the business of living and creating a healthy life. I don’t see how the current conditions are sustainable. The sickness that has pervaded too much of the American culture and now American deomcratic institutions and democracy itself, from the base to the Supreme Court, is deadly. But succumbing to mourning is deadly too.

Righters Block

I haven’t said much here in quite some time. It’s not that there isn’t anything left to say. It’s just been a horrendous case of Righters Block.

Righters kvetch about freedom while blocking access. The righters block loves walls and barricades, obstructing processes and others. Righters tear down that wall of Democracy that is the foundation of freedom. It’s a party of destruction that is punishing all that’s left.

Disruption is their right, while blocking safety for the rest. Facts remain on the side of what’s left, exposing truth and lies that righters tell. It’s insanity. Crazy like Fox, anything goes because they have rights, no matter how wrong.

We live in an era of storytelling. Maybe we always did. Now, everyone is a storyteller. It’s even encouraged and platformed. Meanwhile, righters block evidence as having any meaning, and ideate strategies to the contrary.

Righters claim populism and patriotism and nationalism and supremacy, redefining and insinuating with hopes of defeating. Righters block responsibility feeling entitled to anything and accountable for nothing.

There is no contest when suffering righters block. Being left alone to anguish and expose reality, those seeking to conserve Democracy have been flailing. Institutions have been weakened by righters block, but are not yet left for dead.

Too many weapons of mass destruction fired off by boys who are proud and keepers of an oath, automatically arming themselves for….?

I have no idea.

….Other than the notion that power trumps and powers Trump. Left to their own devices, righters block. This is the unbearably sad, scary, true story of our time.

Conventional Wisdom

I don’t remember ever enjoying the Conventions, and the last several prior to this year’s, I forced myself to endure. Sure there were the rare soaring moments, (Obama 2004), but I generally find them tacky and mostly outdated and useless, except for the nominee’s speech. Yes, people get fired up, which is the point. Then the campaigns go into high gear and bombard us with hyper-intense messaging—usually negative, or idealized. It’s obnoxious and exhausting and usually turns off many voters.

In an attempt to change the game, Obama’s campaigns were mostly positive and summoning Americans’ better angels. He was criticized for his “Yes We Can” bromide. The stakes in 2008 seamed existential, as the economy was in free-fall and we were embroiled in those seemingly endless wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. And Sarah Palin was unleashed and the viciousness that was until then unimaginable, was released. 

The expansion of communications and media throughout the 21st century has made each Presidential campaign a bit different from previous ones. (The Citizens United decision of 2010 allowed unrestricted corporate spending on election communications.) As much of the ways in which Presidential campaigns were being run were changing, the party conventions remained relatively conventional (and largely insufferable).

Then came 2020. This COVID-19 Pandemic that has destroyed over 170,000 American lives and crushed their families (as of this writing), and over 5 million cases of the virus in  5 months (that we know of at this writing) has been a disaster that none of us have seen before, which includes a nightmarish economy, not to mention the reckoning with systemic racism that has made enduring the pandemic that much worse. And climate issues are even harder to manage with this pandemic. There is no Presidential leadership–only corruption and division. We never imagined we would be living in this America. The virus has been a threat around the globe, but American exceptionalism has taken a new and dreadful form. The Trump administration has nothing to offer but lies, hate, and distraction. His abdication from his duty to protect Americans is stunning and yet after 4 years of his cruel absurdities, we know we can’t expect anything else. Meanwhile, this extremely horrific pathogen (I mean COVID-19), has upended life for the next many months to come. 

How could there be a national party convention when people can not gather together? Conventional wisdom would suggest that it would be a rare substitute this cycle, and we could return to normal next time. BUT…..necessity birthed an invention that showcased some of the greatest American beauty. I didn’t watch the entirety of the event this week, but saw some key features and speeches, and despite some conventional cheesiness, the necessary format Zoomed into our essence: The cross-country roll call must be the new format. The absence of a live audience somehow created a more direct and intimate experience for the viewer. We were each being addressed. The cross section of every demographic represented a truer us. US. The emphasis on decency and having a plan for action, for each American’s participation, was urgent and in this moment, authentic. It was less lofty and idealistic, and more about basic goodness and actions that we all need to take to ensure that we all can move forward. It was incredibly powerful in a most unconventional convention. 

Everyone has a role to play, even from a distance. We have much that needs addressing just to be functional, and for a just recovery for all. It was important to pause and celebrate the milestone of Kamala Harris’ nomination, and admire the steadfast decency of Joe Biden, and so many people who were featured who stood for decency and dignity.  The pain and loss is profound now, but this unconventional convention provided us with the wisdom that seeing so many who look and sound so varied can be united in purpose and take common action. This is US. This is our Democracy that insists on each one of us to pull together. Conventional wisdom? We needed the reminder! 

Low Grade

It wasn’t just that Michelle Obama recently expressed how we all feel these days (… weeks, months, years), but that she articulated the truth with such precision: “some sort of low-grade depression”.  I think that’s how we knew it was/is the truth. There was a universal nod. YEP. 

We are all trying to cope with extreme and constant disruption, even when we are basically ok. We are fearful and angry. We are frustrated and fatigued. We are anxious and sad. Even when we are otherwise ok. We don’t feel ok. Ok. America is not ok, even if individuals are hanging in there. 

We are terrified of the fever out there. Everything feels feverish. The intensity of the fever overwhelms, and the experience for most of us is exhaustion. Low-grade depression. Meanwhile, the POTUS seems to do everything possible to enable the fever’s spread. Whether or not he experiences delusions, he inspires them. 

The multiple contagions afflicting us feel overpowering. The persistence is enervating. How will we be able to live with this going forward? 

When we can’t just breathe, because a police officer is shooting or choking someone, or COVID-19 has consumed one’s lung capacity, we can air the truth. Thank you, Michelle Obama.

I couldn’t help but notice that her choice of words, “low-grade depression”, which seemed to resonate so exactly with our experience, was so perfect for this moment. No one seems to care more about grades than Trump. I’m not aware of any adult who cares about grades (other than being concerned about their kids’ grades). 

When Trump was saying anything to get media attention during the Obama administration, he glommed onto the “Birther” conspiracy theory in attempt to get attention, test the political winds, fan the fires of racism, build his brand, and whatever else explains his disgusting lies. But he also made a point of bringing up (or making up) President Obama’s grades. Even then I thought it was a weird and pathetic attempt to make some sort of point. 

Trump ran for POTUS talking about having “the best words”, and his great grades, and other school related nonsense. Remember when Michael Cohen revealed that Trump directed him to ensure that the College Board and colleges never release Trump’s grades or SATs? What is it with Trump and grades? 

Of course, he projects and lies and is shameless in doing so. 

And we are struggling on every front as a result of Trump’s incompetence, corruption, and shamefulness. He gets the lowest grade of any POTUS. 

Resignation

Why has no one called for Trump’s resignation? His commuting Roger Stone’s prison sentence, despite ample evidence of Stone’s guilt, provided the familiar dyspepsia of horror without surprise.  Trump’s gall is endless. As is Stone’s. (I’m sure there’s a gallstone joke somewhere….)

But even Mitt Romney, who dared to vote to convict Trump, and called Stone’s commutation “unprecedented, historic corruption”, didn’t call for Trump’s resignation. Why bother? Americans can vote him out in November.

We heard that argument before the Impeachment proceedings. It’s too risky. We can just vote him out. Meanwhile, what could possibly be worse than what lead to the Impeachment?

Amidst the heinous policies against immigrants, that includes family separations still, and caging children, Trump has withdrawn from our allies and has continued to cozy up to autocrats. He is unconcerned with the plight of Americans, or those who seek to live as Americans, unless he benefits personally. 

Meanwhile, the only one who has not begun to confront the hideous, systemic racism embedded in our American being, is Trump. As the country is pained and seeks healing and transformation, he wants to restore the statues that glorified the Confederacy—that seceded from the U.S! As statues came down, literally all that’s left is the base.

And yet, while we as a country have been resigned to racism in insidious forms, we are being lead once again by a movement toward dignity—Black Lives Matter. The overt brutality caught on video has been effective in showing what most White people don’t see or experience. There is profound concern that the resignation that has endured for so long in this country will continue without dramatic change. 

And the concern about November….besides a rigged system of gerrymandering that has persisted and expanded for decades disenfranchising voters, especially Black and Latinx voters, we are losing a battle against COVID-19, that has us sequestered to stay healthy.

Trump’s abdication of responsibility to keep Americans safe should have demanded calls for his resignation, but we have been too resigned to his crazy. His recklessness and laziness, not to mention an ability to govern or be a serious human, has actual repercussions. His demand to re-open schools without adequate policy proposals or funding so that they are safe is simply cruel. 

It’s hard to list the top most egregious displays of flagrant abuse, but I still can not wrap my head around the Russian bounty on American troops in Afghanistan. Trump claims to not have been briefed. Still, there has been no effort to do anything about the fact that Russia has put a bounty on American troops in Afghanistan. No calls for resignation. 

Vote him out? We started with Russian interference in our elections. Here we go again. Resignation? Voter suppression. Resignation? A PANDEMIC that makes going to the polls a personal and public potentially life-threatening situation. And he seeks to limit mail-in ballots. Vote him out?

We are the ones who have been resigned. We have been resigned to injustice for too long. We have been believing that institutions and norms are too entrenched and difficult to change, and yet Trump has easily trampled and dismantled. 

We have revered traditions, institutions, and norms, even ones that have outlived their use, and have become afraid of big changes. Yet here we sit at home, if we are able to and are considerate, forced to change our behavior. We can’t be resigned to not take responsibility now. (I know–doubly negative.) We can’t be resigned and await guidance, hope, support from this so-called POTUS. Our representatives should have called for his resignation, but we have all been too resigned. 

Absent calls for Trump’s resignation, we must confront our own. 

Thank You Notes

Thank you, President Trump, for your assuredness early on in the COVID19 pandemic, as it began in the USA. What a relief it was to know that you could declare that this was just like the flu. No big deal. 

Thank you, President Trump, for reminding us that, “One day, it’s like a miracle. It’s going to disappear.” We should all live so long.

Thank you, President Trump, for letting us know that, “Anyone who wants a test can get one.” Well, nobody really WANTS to get that COVID19 test, right?

Thank you, President Trump, for announcing that, “A vaccine will be available soon.” 18 months is not that long. I mean an 18 month old is still a baby.  

Thank you, President Trump, for asserting that the US was “the most prepared country in the world.” I’m sure we were; just not since 2016.

Thank you, President Trump, for suggesting that this novel Coronavirus was a Democrat hoax, distraction, attempt to undermine your presidency. Your instincts are truly consistent. We can count on you to remind us of other awfulness, at any moment for any reason.

Thank you, President Trump, for closely watching the stock market plummet while COVID19 cases and deaths continue to rise exponentially. Now we have a two-front war.

Thank you, President Trump, for calling yourself a “Wartime President”. I was thinking of some other names. 

Thank you, President Trump, for your daily briefings. They are anything but brief, and barely informative, since the next one introduces a different protocol than previously suggested. Your omnipresence is hard to miss. I feel like I have a front row seat at one of your rallies. 

Thank you, President Trump, for mentioning Governor Cuomo in New York, and Governor Newsom in California and that woman in Michigan. So many governors.

Thank you, President Trump, for acknowledging your status as #1 on Facebook. WOW! I can’t begin to imagine how many hits that means.

Thank you, President Trump, for exemplifying family values and showing confidence in your do-it-all-son-in-law, Jared Kushner. You understand better than anyone, that youth, unencumbered by mastery, experience, or any success, gives a pandemic a new look. His understanding of the separation of Federal and State stuff is really amazing. When he said, “…Our stockpile” is not for state use, he must have meant that the federal stockpile is intended to supplement the states’ needs. See, he gets it. We have so much yet to learn!

Thank you, President Trump, for insisting on “regular” voting—none of this mail in ballot stuff. Changing anything now would be so difficult. I know you want to see a Democratic Convention this summer.  I’m sure you would love to see people go to their regular polling places in November. Your commitment to keeping America great (again) is always on full display. 

The Sharpie’s the Point

It’s hard to think of a single moment or tweet that would define this President or this presidency. Each one seems to be jaw dropping.  But his Etch-a Sketch altering the National Weather Service’s map of Hurricane Dorian’s path points to the profound stupidity, ignorance, stubbornness, illegality, incompetency, and as Pete Buttigieg suggested, “pathetic”-ness of this presidency.

The visual of the Sharpie map, much less being held up by Trump, is one that will linger longer than the chants or the tweets. Have you ever seen anything so amateur, much less from the office that is supposed to be the most professional in the world? Of course the entire presidency has been amateur at best.  This White House doesn’t even feign professionalism or the art of governance. They provide fake news and might as well use an Etch-a-Sketch. Just shake it and it goes away. But this one won’t.

The point of Trump’s magic marker alteration of Dorian’s path was a contemptible attempt to “prove” that he did not misspeak about the hurricane risk to Alabama. Like magic, he could mark the path as he meant it to be on an official government weather map and everything would be ok. Except that people’s homes and lives were in danger (or not). People had to make actual decisions that affected their lives. Oh, and it’s illegal to alter a National Weather Service map. 

Like he has always done, Trump reveals his truth by projection. His accusations of fake news could not be more perfectly manifested than on his Sharpie map. His ignorance, (either not knowing, or not caring, or both) of the legal ramifications in the moment, were literally on display.  His lack of talent, intellect, knowledge, curiosity, thoughtfulness, steadiness, decency, maturity, flexibility, depth, or caring were indelibly marked with that Sharpie. He doesn’t even play POTUS well. He blames everyone for what he is and does. He knows it and so do we. He can try to show a false projection, but we know better. 

Whenever you get frustrated over actual policies that require nuance and compromise and serious thought, remember this ridiculous map. That cone of silence that is the party of Trump is complicit in all that is deplorable emanating from this White House. Sharpies are for labeling. Trump is good at labeling. That’s it. The Sharpie’s the point. I hope this absurd incident will remain indelible. We need to remember that we can be (and have) so much better. 

Make No Bones

Make no bones about it….telling someone (much less four women of color who are MEMBERS OF CONGRESS) to go back to their countries is a bigoted, hateful, racist, deplorably hideous statement. It is also reflective of an an ignorant and stupid person playing POTUS, as 3 of the 4 Congresswomen were born in the USA, and the 4th is a naturalized citizen. It’s a shameful and disgraceful statement to say to anyone, not to mention, immature and pathetic. 

In response to criticism that the POTUS is a racist, he declared that he doesn’t have “a racist bone in his body”.  And of course, the responses to that ranged from suggesting that he has a racist spleen, to a racist heart, and mind. 

Apparently, one can say that tweets are racist and have that be distinct from the tweeter being racist. We all know how absurd this whole thing is, and we all know how unacceptable this is from anyone, much less the POTUS.

Make no bones about it, bigotry is anti-Democratic; it is UnAmerican (in the aspirational sense).  Of course, the skeletons in America’s closet have always been about bigotry and discrimination.  The calcification of hate has allowed it to re-emerge front and center, and cause excruciating pain. 

Plenty has been said about the phrase, “I don’t have a racist bone in my body”, which only seems to be uttered by people who make bigoted comments, even if they don’t think they are saying something bigoted or racist. The obviousness is not lost. The certainty of exclusion and discrimination is definite, even if cowards refuse to acknowledge it. 

Make no bones about it, with the exception of 4 Republicans in The House, and one Independent, the Republican party stands in solidarity with a POTUS who is utterly reprehensible. They choose to defend the indefensible, and the shocking cowardice mounts daily.

If someone wanted to express dissatisfaction, they would “make no bones about it”.  It would be a simple, unequivocal statement, not a tortured word salad. In fact, the phrase “make no bones about it” derives from 15th century England. In this origin story, if one found bones in soup, it made it difficult and unsatisfying to eat. Make no bones about it—its consistency is satisfactory.

Make no bones about it, we know hate and fear when we have to digest it daily (if not hourly). We see discrimination and cruelty every day with policies; with cold cases and new cases; with ridiculous verdicts that let evil go unpunished and unchecked; with the megaphone that the Troller in Chief uses to expel gas that gets ignited by fearful, angry cowards who feel powerful by ranting and spewing hate, which they like to cloak in faux love and patriotism.  

People can have radically different views of patriotism and a vision for our country without discriminating. Make no bones about it, we know that those who stand with hateful words and actions are complicit, and we are so much better than those who seek to spoil.