January Jonesing

Somehow, so many accomplishments of 2015 were forgotten in the final season, as acts of terror, violence, and hate saturated our media and our senses, and left us feeling helpless, somewhat hopeless, and terrified. And disgusted. Violence and hate seem to be not only timeless, but endless, and less and less about a moment than a terminal condition.

January, in the middle of winter, is the fresh start we always crave and celebrate. She seems barely approachable when the fall always seems to surprise us with crashes or severe storms or political upheaval (even just elections), and we think we will be settled into a new calm and yet be invigorated.

January is alluring in her cool, which we desire after tempests and the inflammation that we tend to experience with intensity by December. 2015 exited with practically unbearable inflammation— mostly The Donald’s, but also with terrorists and other horrifying violence here, there, and everywhere.

January’s attraction is undeniable. She is quiet, but seemingly purposeful. She has a quality of purity, but not innocence. She is serious and clearly intentional, seeming to know what we want. She seems so wise, yet untainted. We’ve been jonesing for her cool.

Of course, January will become icy. That’s her way. She will become indifferent and then harsh. Bitter cold. Even in warm climates, January becomes another pretty face. She may be pleasant; even lovely for a while. I just recognize her. She’s beautiful, and can be friendly—or at least mild—but her nature yields to indifference and even harshness . That’s how cool is.

She lets us make the first move. But for some, they are already frozen. That first date was ignored, other than an opportunity to chill. They are needing some warmth—not fiery passion, but a bit of warmth to be able to slowly thaw. January doesn’t really offer much warmth, but she seems rather calm and composed, especially when we first see her. Maybe her cool is warm enough, even at a low temperature, to allow the rational to take over—at least for a bit.

By the end of the year, we are jonesing for January. Our overwhelming need for calm and cool may not be sustainable, but it is necessary, and we feel it and know it. We desire her, even knowing we can’t be with her for very long. We may forget that she is the way she is, just as we forget the way we are.
January is beautiful. She attracts our best intentions and our desire for excellence and progress. Her quiet is temporary, and allows us to think, even as we are smitten by the prospect of something new with her. And although she is the way she is, and we are the way we are, causing us to part, we long for her after a year of steps and missteps; assaults and breakthrough moments. January is a vision.

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